Articulacy???

Whilst I do not claim any credit for the following it reminds me of many call centres that have phoned me over the years. If just one person has never heard of this alleged story then it was worth posting...It often enters my thoughts.

The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service, at a hotel in Asia , which was recorded and published in the Far East Economic Review (huh, allergically [can't spell the other))


Room Service (RS) : 'Morrin. - Roon sirbees.'
Guest (G) : 'Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service. '
RS : 'Rye .. Roon sirbees . morrin! Jewish to oddor sunteen?'
G : 'Uh..yes. I'd like some bacon and eggs.'
RS : 'Ow July den?'
G : 'What ?'
RS : 'Ow July den ? ... pryed, boyud, poochd?'
G : 'Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please.'
RS : 'Ow July dee baykem? Crease?'
G : 'Crisp will be fine.'
RS : 'Hokay. An sahn toes?'
G : 'What?'
RS : 'An toes. July sahn toes?'
G : 'I don't think so.'
RS : 'No ? Judo wan sahn toes ?'
G : 'I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo wan sahn toes' means.'
RS : 'Toes! toes!....Why jew don juan toes? Ow bow Anglish moppin we bodder?'
G : 'English muffin!! I've got it! You were saying Toast.' Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine.'
RS : 'We bodder?'
G : 'No ... just put the bodder on the side.'
RS : 'Wad! ?'
G : 'I mean butter...just put it on the side.'
RS : 'Copy?'
G : 'Excuse me?'
RS : 'Copy ... tea ... meel ?'
G : 'Yes. Coffee, please, and that's all.'
RS : 'One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin w bodder on sigh and copy .... rye ?'
G : 'Whatever you say.'
RS : 'Tenjewberrymuds. '
G : 'You're very welcome.'

Ahhhh, does it for me evry time,

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In indonesia they cannot understand a word, its a lucky dip everytime you order something, pointing helped a lot! Yet in Bali their English is fantastic.

In the Philippines they speak amazing English, but just do not listen, McDonalds deliver, and when you ring and order you just get to the point where you say yes to it all, as they cannot understand that you do not want Spaghetti (Yes, seriously) so you just spend a fiver and hope it contains some of what you ordered!

Cyprus is the best, was there 5 or 6 times last year, and the first few places I ate in or shopped in I spoke to them in Pidgeon English, and pointed a lot, only to get a London accent telling you no worries mate! All bloody Londoners! So trying to speak slowly because of the language barrier is not helpful, just makes you look like a tw**!

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ahh Cyprus, happy days! After being stationed there for 3 years defending our nation against attack from Eskimoes, and personally protecting Anglais Brandy supplies, about the only Greek and Turkish I picked up was the usual barrage of swear words.

Your right though, Greek Cypriot definately has a tinge of Cockney, Kalimera ray, cor blimey gov Unless of course you are haggling, then its no speake the english

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cheers
Steve

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Mike - this is really funny - put a smile on my face - my usual grumpy start to a morning lol

awww Steve - why mention Cyprus - really could do with a jimmys kebab now!

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Thanks
Clive

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